Walden

PART ONE · 1/12

Walden

PART ONE

¹ANTHEM by Ayn Rand CONTENTS It is a sin to write this. ²It is a sin to think words no others think and to put them down upon a paper no others are to see. ³It is base and evil. ⁴It is as if we were speaking alone to no ears but our own. ⁵And we know well that there is no transgression blacker than to do or think alone. ⁶We have broken the laws. ⁷The laws say that men may not write unless the Council of Vocations bid them so. ⁸May we be forgiven! ⁹But this is not the only sin upon us. ¹⁰We have committed a greater crime, and for this crime there is no name. ¹¹What punishment awaits us if it be discovered we know not, for no such crime has come in the memory of men and there are no laws to provide for it. ¹²It is dark here. ¹³The flame of the candle stands still in the air. ¹⁴Nothing moves in this tunnel save our hand on the paper. ¹⁵We are alone here under the earth. ¹⁶It is a fearful word, alone. ¹⁷The laws say that none among men may be alone, ever and at any time, for this is the great transgression and the root of all evil. ¹⁸But we have broken many laws. ¹⁹And now there is nothing here save our one body, and it is strange to see only two legs stretched on the ground, and on the wall before us the shadow of our one head. ²⁰The walls are cracked and water runs upon them in thin threads without sound, black and glistening as blood. ²¹We stole the candle from the larder of the Home of the Street Sweepers. ²²We shall be sentenced to ten years in the Palace of Corrective Detention if it be discovered. ²³But this matters not. ²⁴It matters only that the light is precious and we should not waste it to write when we need it for that work which is our crime. ²⁵Nothing matters save the work, our secret, our evil, our precious work. ²⁶Still, we must also write, for—may the Council have mercy upon us!—we wish to speak for once to no ears but our own. ²⁷Our name is Equality 7-2521, as it is written on the iron bracelet which all men wear on their left wrists with their names upon it. ²⁸We are twenty-one years old. ²⁹We are six feet tall, and this is a burden, for there are not many men who are six feet tall. ³⁰Ever have the Teachers and the Leaders pointed to us and frowned and said: “There is evil in your bones, Equality 7-2521, for your body has grown beyond the bodies of your brothers.” ³¹But we cannot change our bones nor our body. ³²We were born with a curse. ³³It has always driven us to thoughts which are forbidden. ³⁴It has always given us wishes which men may not wish. ³⁵We know that we are evil, but there is no will in us and no power to resist it. ³⁶This is our wonder and our secret fear, that we know and do not resist. ³⁷We strive to be like all our brother men, for all men must be alike. ³⁸Over the portals of the Palace of the World Council, there are words cut in the marble, which we repeat to ourselves whenever we are tempted: “WE ARE ONE IN ALL AND ALL IN ONE. ³⁹THERE ARE NO MEN BUT ONLY THE GREAT _WE_, ONE, INDIVISIBLE AND FOREVER.” ⁴⁰We repeat this to ourselves, but it helps us not. ⁴¹These words were cut long ago. ⁴²There is green mould in the grooves of the letters and yellow streaks on the marble, which come from more years than men could count. ⁴³And these words are the truth, for they are written on the Palace of the World Council, and the World Council is the body of all truth. ⁴⁴Thus has it been ever since the Great Rebirth, and farther back than that no memory can reach. ⁴⁵But we must never speak of the times before the Great Rebirth, else we are sentenced to three years in the Palace of Corrective Detention. ⁴⁶It is only the Old Ones who whisper about it in the evenings, in the Home of the Useless. ⁴⁷They whisper many strange things, of the towers which rose to the sky, in those Unmentionable Times, and of the wagons which moved without horses, and of the lights which burned without flame. ⁴⁸But those times were evil. ⁴⁹And those times passed away, when men saw the Great Truth which is this: that all men are one and that there is no will save the will of all men together. ⁵⁰All men are good and wise. ⁵¹It is only we, Equality 7-2521, we alone who were born with a curse. ⁵²For we are not like our brothers. ⁵³And as we look back upon our life, we see that it has ever been thus and that it has brought us step by step to our last, supreme transgression, our crime of crimes hidden here under the ground. ⁵⁴We remember the Home of the Infants where we lived till we were five years old, together with all the children of the City who had been born in the same year. ⁵⁵The sleeping halls there were white and clean and bare of all things save one hundred beds. ⁵⁶We were just like all our brothers then, save for the one transgression: we fought with our brothers. ⁵⁷There are few offenses blacker than to fight with our brothers, at any age and for any cause whatsoever. ⁵⁸The Council of the Home told us so, and of all the children of that year, we were locked in the cellar most often. ⁵⁹When we were five years old, we were sent to the Home of the Students, where there are ten wards, for our ten years of learning. ⁶⁰Men must learn till they reach their fifteenth year. ⁶¹Then they go to work. ⁶²In the Home of the Students we arose when the big bell rang in the tower and we went to our beds when it rang again. ⁶³Before we removed our garments, we stood in the great sleeping hall, and we raised our right arms, and we said all together with the three Teachers at the head: “We are nothing. ⁶⁴Mankind is all. ⁶⁵By the grace of our brothers are we allowed our lives. ⁶⁶We exist through, by and for our brothers who are the State. ⁶⁷Amen.” ⁶⁸Then we slept. ⁶⁹The sleeping halls were white and clean and bare of all things save one hundred beds. ⁷⁰We, Equality 7-2521, were not happy in those years in the Home of the Students. ⁷¹It was not that the learning was too hard for us. ⁷²It was that the learning was too easy. ⁷³This is a great sin, to be born with a head which is too quick. ⁷⁴It is not good to be different from our brothers, but it is evil to be superior to them. ⁷⁵The Teachers told us so, and they frowned when they looked upon us. ⁷⁶So we fought against this curse. ⁷⁷We tried to forget our lessons, but we always remembered. ⁷⁸We tried not to understand what the Teachers taught, but we always understood it before the Teachers had spoken. ⁷⁹We looked upon Union 5-3992, who were a pale boy with only half a brain, and we tried to say and do as they did, that we might be like them, like Union 5-3992, but somehow the Teachers knew that we were not. ⁸⁰And we were lashed more often than all the other children. ⁸¹The Teachers were just, for they had been appointed by the Councils, and the Councils are the voice of all justice, for they are the voice of all men. ⁸²And if sometimes, in the secret darkness of our heart, we regret that which befell us on our fifteenth birthday, we know that it was through our own guilt. ⁸³We had broken a law, for we had not paid heed to the words of our Teachers. ⁸⁴The Teachers had said to us all: “Dare not choose in your minds the work you would like to do when you leave the Home of the Students. ⁸⁵You shall do that which the Council of Vocations shall prescribe for you. ⁸⁶For the Council of Vocations knows in its great wisdom where you are needed by your brother men, better than you can know it in your unworthy little minds. ⁸⁷And if you are not needed by your brother man, there is no reason for you to burden the earth with your bodies.” ⁸⁸We knew this well, in the years of our childhood, but our curse broke our will. ⁸⁹We were guilty and we confess it here: we were guilty of the great Transgression of Preference. ⁹⁰We preferred some work and some lessons to the others. ⁹¹We did not listen well to the history of all the Councils elected since the Great Rebirth. ⁹²But we loved the Science of Things. ⁹³We wished to know. ⁹⁴We wished to know about all the things which make the earth around us. ⁹⁵We asked so many questions that the Teachers forbade it. ⁹⁶We think that there are mysteries in the sky and under the water and in the plants which grow. ⁹⁷But the Council of Scholars has said that there are no mysteries, and the Council of Scholars knows all things. ⁹⁸And we learned much from our Teachers. ⁹⁹We learned that the earth is flat and that the sun revolves around it, which causes the day and the night. ¹⁰⁰We learned the names of all the winds which blow over the seas and push the sails of our great ships. ¹⁰¹We learned how to bleed men to cure them of all ailments. ¹⁰²We loved the Science of Things. ¹⁰³And in the darkness, in the secret hour, when we awoke in the night and there were no brothers around us, but only their shapes in the beds and their snores, we closed our eyes, and we held our lips shut, and we stopped our breath, that no shudder might let our brothers see or hear or guess, and we thought that we wished to be sent to the Home of the Scholars when our time would come. ¹⁰⁴All the great modern inventions come from the Home of the Scholars, such as the newest one, which was found only a hundred years ago, of how to make candles from wax and string; also, how to make glass, which is put in our windows to protect us from the rain. ¹⁰⁵To find these things, the Scholars must study the earth and learn from the rivers, from the sands, from the winds and the rocks. ¹⁰⁶And if we went to the Home of the Scholars, we could learn from these also. ¹⁰⁷We could ask questions of these, for they do not forbid questions. ¹⁰⁸And questions give us no rest. ¹⁰⁹We know not why our curse makes us seek we know not what, ever and ever. ¹¹⁰But we cannot resist it. ¹¹¹It whispers to us that there are great things on this earth of ours, and that we can know them if we try, and that we must know them. ¹¹²We ask, why must we know, but it has no answer to give us. ¹¹³We must know that we may know. ¹¹⁴So we wished to be sent to the Home of the Scholars. ¹¹⁵We wished it so much that our hands trembled under the blankets in the night, and we bit our arm to stop that other pain which we could not endure. ¹¹⁶It was evil and we dared not face our brothers in the morning. ¹¹⁷For men may wish nothing for themselves. ¹¹⁸And we were punished when the Council of Vocations came to give us our life Mandates which tell those who reach their fifteenth year what their work is to be for the rest of their days. ¹¹⁹The Council of Vocations came on the first day of spring, and they sat in the great hall. ¹²⁰And we who were fifteen and all the Teachers came into the great hall. ¹²¹And the Council of Vocations sat on a high dais, and they had but two words to speak to each of the Students. ¹²²They called the Students’ names, and when the Students stepped before them, one after another, the Council said: “Carpenter” or “Doctor” or “Cook” or “Leader.” ¹²³Then each Student raised their right arm and said: “The will of our brothers be done.” ¹²⁴Now if the Council has said “Carpenter” or “Cook,” the Students so assigned go to work and they do not study any further. ¹²⁵But if the Council has said “Leader,” then those Students go into the Home of the Leaders, which is the greatest house in the City, for it has three stories. ¹²⁶And there they study for many years, so that they may become candidates and be elected to the City Council and the State Council and the World Council—by a free and general vote of all men. ¹²⁷But we wished not to be a Leader, even though it is a great honor. ¹²⁸We wished to be a Scholar. ¹²⁹So we awaited our turn in the great hall and then we heard the Council of Vocations call our name: “Equality 7-2521.” ¹³⁰We walked to the dais, and our legs did not tremble, and we looked up at the Council. ¹³¹There were five members of the Council, three of the male gender and two of the female. ¹³²Their hair was white and their faces were cracked as the clay of a dry river bed. ¹³³They were old. ¹³⁴They seemed older than the marble of the Temple of the World Council. ¹³⁵They sat before us and they did not move. ¹³⁶And we saw no breath to stir the folds of their white togas. ¹³⁷But we knew that they were alive, for a finger of the hand of the oldest rose, pointed to us, and fell down again. ¹³⁸This was the only thing which moved, for the lips of the oldest did not move as they said: “Street Sweeper.” ¹³⁹We felt the cords of our neck grow tight as our head rose higher to look upon the faces of the Council, and we were happy. ¹⁴⁰We knew we had been guilty, but now we had a way to atone for it. ¹⁴¹We would accept our Life Mandate, and we would work for our brothers, gladly and willingly, and we would erase our sin against them, which they did not know, but we knew. ¹⁴²So we were happy, and proud of ourselves and of our victory over ourselves. ¹⁴³We raised our right arm and we spoke, and our voice was the clearest, the steadiest voice in the hall that day, and we said: “The will of our brothers be done.” ¹⁴⁴And we looked straight into the eyes of the Council, but their eyes were as cold blue glass buttons. ¹⁴⁵So we went into the Home of the Street Sweepers. ¹⁴⁶It is a grey house on a narrow street. ¹⁴⁷There is a sundial in its courtyard, by which the Council of the Home can tell the hours of the day and when to ring the bell. ¹⁴⁸When the bell rings, we all arise from our beds. ¹⁴⁹The sky is green and cold in our windows to the east. ¹⁵⁰The shadow on the sundial marks off a half-hour while we dress and eat our breakfast in the dining hall, where there are five long tables with twenty clay plates and twenty clay cups on each table. ¹⁵¹Then we go to work in the streets of the City, with our brooms and our rakes. ¹⁵²In five hours, when the sun is high, we return to the Home and we eat our midday meal, for which one-half hour is allowed. ¹⁵³Then we go to work again. ¹⁵⁴In five hours, the shadows are blue on the pavements, and the sky is blue with a deep brightness which is not bright. ¹⁵⁵We come back to have our dinner, which lasts one hour. ¹⁵⁶Then the bell rings and we walk in a straight column to one of the City Halls, for the Social Meeting. ¹⁵⁷Other columns of men arrive from the Homes of the different Trades. ¹⁵⁸The candles are lit, and the Councils of the different Homes stand in a pulpit, and they speak to us of our duties and of our brother men. ¹⁵⁹Then visiting Leaders mount the pulpit and they read to us the speeches which were made in the City Council that day, for the City Council represents all men and all men must know. ¹⁶⁰Then we sing hymns, the Hymn of Brotherhood, and the Hymn of Equality, and the Hymn of the Collective Spirit. ¹⁶¹The sky is a soggy purple when we return to the Home. ¹⁶²Then the bell rings and we walk in a straight column to the City Theatre for three hours of Social Recreation. ¹⁶³There a play is shown upon the stage, with two great choruses from the Home of the Actors, which speak and answer all together, in two great voices. ¹⁶⁴The plays are about toil and how good it is. ¹⁶⁵Then we walk back to the Home in a straight column. ¹⁶⁶The sky is like a black sieve pierced by silver drops that tremble, ready to burst through. ¹⁶⁷The moths beat against the street lanterns. ¹⁶⁸We go to our beds and we sleep, till the bell rings again. ¹⁶⁹The sleeping halls are white and clean and bare of all things save one hundred beds. ¹⁷⁰Thus have we lived each day of four years, until two springs ago when our crime happened. ¹⁷¹Thus must all men live until they are forty. ¹⁷²At forty, they are worn out. ¹⁷³At forty, they are sent to the Home of the Useless, where the Old Ones live. ¹⁷⁴The Old Ones do not work, for the State takes care of them. ¹⁷⁵They sit in the sun in summer and they sit by the fire in winter. ¹⁷⁶They do not speak often, for they are weary. ¹⁷⁷The Old Ones know that they are soon to die. ¹⁷⁸When a miracle happens and some live to be forty-five, they are the Ancient Ones, and the children stare at them when passing by the Home of the Useless. ¹⁷⁹Such is to be our life, as that of all our brothers and of the brothers who came before us. ¹⁸⁰Such would have been our life, had we not committed our crime which changed all things for us. ¹⁸¹And it was our curse which drove us to our crime. ¹⁸²We had been a good Street Sweeper and like all our brother Street Sweepers, save for our cursed wish to know. ¹⁸³We looked too long at the stars at night, and at the trees and the earth. ¹⁸⁴And when we cleaned the yard of the Home of the Scholars, we gathered the glass vials, the pieces of metal, the dried bones which they had discarded. ¹⁸⁵We wished to keep these things and to study them, but we had no place to hide them. ¹⁸⁶So we carried them to the City Cesspool. ¹⁸⁷And then we made the discovery. ¹⁸⁸It was on a day of the spring before last. ¹⁸⁹We Street Sweepers work in brigades of three, and we were with Union 5-3992, they of the half-brain, and with International 4-8818. ¹⁹⁰Now Union 5-3992 are a sickly lad and sometimes they are stricken with convulsions, when their mouth froths and their eyes turn white. ¹⁹¹But International 4-8818 are different. ¹⁹²They are a tall, strong youth and their eyes are like fireflies, for there is laughter in their eyes. ¹⁹³We cannot look upon International 4-8818 and not smile in answer. ¹⁹⁴For this they were not liked in the Home of the Students, as it is not proper to smile without reason. ¹⁹⁵And also they were not liked because they took pieces of coal and they drew pictures upon the walls, and they were pictures which made men laugh. ¹⁹⁶But it is only our brothers in the Home of the Artists who are permitted to draw pictures, so International 4-8818 were sent to the Home of the Street Sweepers, like ourselves. ¹⁹⁷International 4-8818 and we are friends. ¹⁹⁸This is an evil thing to say, for it is a transgression, the great Transgression of Preference, to love any among men better than the others, since we must love all men and all men are our friends. ¹⁹⁹So International 4-8818 and we have never spoken of it. ²⁰⁰But we know. ²⁰¹We know, when we look into each other’s eyes. ²⁰²And when we look thus without words, we both know other things also, strange things for which there are no words, and these things frighten us. ²⁰³So on that day of the spring before last, Union 5-3992 were stricken with convulsions on the edge of the City, near the City Theatre. ²⁰⁴We left them to lie in the shade of the Theatre tent and we went with International 4-8818 to finish our work. ²⁰⁵We came together to the great ravine behind the Theatre. ²⁰⁶It is empty save for trees and weeds. ²⁰⁷Beyond the ravine there is a plain, and beyond the plain there lies the Uncharted Forest, about which men must not think. ²⁰⁸We were gathering the papers and the rags which the wind had blown from the Theatre, when we saw an iron bar among the weeds. ²⁰⁹It was old and rusted by many rains. ²¹⁰We pulled with all our strength, but we could not move it. ²¹¹So we called International 4-8818, and together we scraped the earth around the bar. ²¹²Of a sudden the earth fell in before us, and we saw an old iron grill over a black hole. ²¹³International 4-8818 stepped back. ²¹⁴But we pulled at the grill and it gave way. ²¹⁵And then we saw iron rings as steps leading down a shaft into a darkness without bottom. ²¹⁶“We shall go down,” we said to International 4-8818. ²¹⁷“It is forbidden,” they answered. ²¹⁸We said: “The Council does not know of this hole, so it cannot be forbidden.” ²¹⁹And they answered: “Since the Council does not know of this hole, there can be no law permitting to enter it. ²²⁰And everything which is not permitted by law is forbidden.” ²²¹But we said: “We shall go, none the less.” ²²²They were frightened, but they stood by and watched us go. ²²³We hung on the iron rings with our hands and our feet. ²²⁴We could see nothing below us. ²²⁵And above us the hole open upon the sky grew smaller and smaller, till it came to be the size of a button. ²²⁶But still we went down. ²²⁷Then our foot touched the ground. ²²⁸We rubbed our eyes, for we could not see. ²²⁹Then our eyes became used to the darkness, but we could not believe what we saw. ²³⁰No men known to us could have built this place, nor the men known to our brothers who lived before us, and yet it was built by men. ²³¹It was a great tunnel. ²³²Its walls were hard and smooth to the touch; it felt like stone, but it was not stone. ²³³On the ground there were long thin tracks of iron, but it was not iron; it felt smooth and cold as glass. ²³⁴We knelt, and we crawled forward, our hand groping along the iron line to see where it would lead. ²³⁵But there was an unbroken night ahead. ²³⁶Only the iron tracks glowed through it, straight and white, calling us to follow. ²³⁷But we could not follow, for we were losing the puddle of light behind us. ²³⁸So we turned and we crawled back, our hand on the iron line. ²³⁹And our heart beat in our fingertips, without reason. ²⁴⁰And then we knew. ²⁴¹We knew suddenly that this place was left from the Unmentionable Times. ²⁴²So it was true, and those Times had been, and all the wonders of those Times. ²⁴³Hundreds upon hundreds of years ago men knew secrets which we have lost. ²⁴⁴And we thought: “This is a foul place. ²⁴⁵They are damned who touch the things of the Unmentionable Times.” ²⁴⁶But our hand which followed the track, as we crawled, clung to the iron as if it would not leave it, as if the skin of our hand were thirsty and begging of the metal some secret fluid beating in its coldness. ²⁴⁷We returned to the earth. ²⁴⁸International 4-8818 looked upon us and stepped back. ²⁴⁹“Equality 7-2521,” they said, “your face is white.” ²⁵⁰But we could not speak and we stood looking upon them. ²⁵¹They backed away, as if they dared not touch us. ²⁵²Then they smiled, but it was not a gay smile; it was lost and pleading. ²⁵³But still we could not speak. ²⁵⁴Then they said: “We shall report our find to the City Council and both of us will be rewarded.” ²⁵⁵And then we spoke. ²⁵⁶Our voice was hard and there was no mercy in our voice. ²⁵⁷We said: “We shall not report our find to the City Council. ²⁵⁸We shall not report it to any men.” ²⁵⁹They raised their hands to their ears, for never had they heard such words as these. ²⁶⁰“International 4-8818,” we asked, “will you report us to the Council and see us lashed to death before your eyes?” ²⁶¹They stood straight all of a sudden and they answered: “Rather would we die.” ²⁶²“Then,” we said, “keep silent. ²⁶³This place is ours. ²⁶⁴This place belongs to us, Equality 7-2521, and to no other men on earth. ²⁶⁵And if ever we surrender it, we shall surrender our life with it also.” ²⁶⁶Then we saw that the eyes of International 4-8818 were full to the lids with tears they dared not drop. ²⁶⁷They whispered, and their voice trembled, so that their words lost all shape: “The will of the Council is above all things, for it is the will of our brothers, which is holy. ²⁶⁸But if you wish it so, we shall obey you. ²⁶⁹Rather shall we be evil with you than good with all our brothers. ²⁷⁰May the Council have mercy upon both our hearts!” ²⁷¹Then we walked away together and back to the Home of the Street Sweepers. ²⁷²And we walked in silence. ²⁷³Thus did it come to pass that each night, when the stars are high and the Street Sweepers sit in the City Theatre, we, Equality 7-2521, steal out and run through the darkness to our place. ²⁷⁴It is easy to leave the Theatre; when the candles are blown out and the Actors come onto the stage, no eyes can see us as we crawl under our seat and under the cloth of the tent. ²⁷⁵Later, it is easy to steal through the shadows and fall in line next to International 4-8818, as the column leaves the Theatre. ²⁷⁶It is dark in the streets and there are no men about, for no men may walk through the City when they have no mission to walk there. ²⁷⁷Each night, we run to the ravine, and we remove the stones which we have piled upon the iron grill to hide it from the men. ²⁷⁸Each night, for three hours, we are under the earth, alone. ²⁷⁹We have stolen candles from the Home of the Street Sweepers, we have stolen flints and knives and paper, and we have brought them to this place. ²⁸⁰We have stolen glass vials and powders and acids from the Home of the Scholars. ²⁸¹Now we sit in the tunnel for three hours each night and we study. ²⁸²We melt strange metals, and we mix acids, and we cut open the bodies of the animals which we find in the City Cesspool. ²⁸³We have built an oven of the bricks we gathered in the streets. ²⁸⁴We burn the wood we find in the ravine. ²⁸⁵The fire flickers in the oven and blue shadows dance upon the walls, and there is no sound of men to disturb us. ²⁸⁶We have stolen manuscripts. ²⁸⁷This is a great offense. ²⁸⁸Manuscripts are precious, for our brothers in the Home of the Clerks spend one year to copy one single script in their clear handwriting. ²⁸⁹Manuscripts are rare and they are kept in the Home of the Scholars. ²⁹⁰So we sit under the earth and we read the stolen scripts. ²⁹¹Two years have passed since we found this place. ²⁹²And in these two years we have learned more than we had learned in the ten years of the Home of the Students. ²⁹³We have learned things which are not in the scripts. ²⁹⁴We have solved secrets of which the Scholars have no knowledge. ²⁹⁵We have come to see how great is the unexplored, and many lifetimes will not bring us to the end of our quest. ²⁹⁶But we wish no end to our quest. ²⁹⁷We wish nothing, save to be alone and to learn, and to feel as if with each day our sight were growing sharper than the hawk’s and clearer than rock crystal. ²⁹⁸Strange are the ways of evil. ²⁹⁹We are false in the faces of our brothers. ³⁰⁰We are defying the will of our Councils. ³⁰¹We alone, of the thousands who walk this earth, we alone in this hour are doing a work which has no purpose save that we wish to do it. ³⁰²The evil of our crime is not for the human mind to probe. ³⁰³The nature of our punishment, if it be discovered, is not for the human heart to ponder. ³⁰⁴Never, not in the memory of the Ancient Ones’ Ancients, never have men done that which we are doing. ³⁰⁵And yet there is no shame in us and no regret. ³⁰⁶We say to ourselves that we are a wretch and a traitor. ³⁰⁷But we feel no burden upon our spirit and no fear in our heart. ³⁰⁸And it seems to us that our spirit is clear as a lake troubled by no eyes save those of the sun. ³⁰⁹And in our heart—strange are the ways of evil!—in our heart there is the first peace we have known in twenty years.

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